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INTERIOR LOVE AFFAIR

Christmas•Self Care•Self Love & Self Care

Self Care through the Holidays

Hey lovely, the holiday season is upon and it’s much different then most. I usually would want to write about how to take care of yourself during the busyness of the holidays, with non-stop dinners, parties, and socializing.

This year is obviously very different. Due to the current pandemic, there is a different type of self care we have to implement. Depending on where you are in the world, your holiday season might look a little different from the rest. Where I am, all of our socializing has been cancelled, and we are being instructed to stay home and not visit with any family or friends. For a lot of us, this is very isolating and upsetting. We have lost something. It’s ok to feel that way. It’s also ok to be glad, that the pressure of hosting and attending all of those events is off for now. Whatever you feel, it’s ok!

So, I have put together a little self care guide to get you through the holidays. Scroll down to check out my 5 self care tips for the holidays.

 

 

During the holiday season, be sure to do these 5 of things to take care of yourself.

1. Accept how you’re feeling and validate it.

You’re feelings are information. They are not there to make your life harder. They are your body’s way of telling you if something is OK, or not OK in your life. Your feelings signal to you if you need to make a change, accept something, protect yourself or reevaluate something. Start allowing your feelings and listening to what they are telling you. Whatever you are feeling during the holidays, take stock of it. One of the reasons people don’t like being home bound with nothing to do is they don’t want to face their true feelings. People are so used to being and staying busy, so busy that there is no time to feel what’s brewing beneath the surface. While this may sound totally acceptable to you, you may even say what’s so wrong with that? If you really want to be happy and at peace with yourself, and live an authentic life (which is why I think you found your way to my blog!), then you have to start facing your feelings. They are the pathway to loving yourself and living the life you’ve always dreamed of living.

2. Connect with loved ones virtually if you can’t physically.

Connection with people is very important. If you’re living alone, or living with people with whom you cannot be your authentic self with, then make the effort to virtually connect with someone you are close to, someone who you can speak freely with and be your true self with. Also make time to virtually see the family and friends you are missing, and would normally want to see at this time of year.

3. Do not skip out on your traditions.

Do you normally host a Christmas brunch? Or a fancy Christmas Eve dinner? Do this tradition anyway! (Just with your own household). Or start a new tradition that you will enjoy with your closest people, it’s a good time to try new things. Do a special activity you would normally not get to do because of how busy it usually is.

4. Be thankful for what you do have, and the people in your life.

No matter what we have, it will never give us sustained happiness if we do not remember to be grateful for it. I bet there are goals you have worked on this year, growth you have experienced, or lessons you have learned this year. I mean its 2020, everybody grew and learned something I believe! Now is a perfect time to reflect upon how far you have come,  on what you have overcome, on what you have improved about your life and yourself, and on any accomplishments you have achieved. It’s also a perfect time to be thankful for the good health you do have, and the relationships that I’m sure have been tested this year and have made it through. For the friendships that have deepened, for the bonds that have solidified over this year, or maybe for what you have finally had the insight and courage to release and walk away from.  Being grateful for what you already have, and have done,  is the key to feeling content in your life.

5. Continue with any self care you already are doing.

Whatever you have already been doing, no matter small or insignificant it may seem, continue doing it. Now is not the time to regress and make matters worse. I have been waking up earlier then my family, and this is the best thing ever! In years past, I would look forward to sleeping in during my winter holidays, but then I would always feel like I am playing catch up through out the day. I truly need an hour or more to myself each morning before I have to be “on” for my kids. So even though I don’t have to get up early right now, I am making the choice to do this, and it’s definitely worth it.

Check out my self care routine here.

 

I am planning on baking cookies with my kids (and eating them of course!), reading, watching movies, doing Christmas puzzles, and video calling with my friends and family whom I would normally see during the holidays.

I am also planning on continuing my self care routine, of long walks outside (rain or shine 🙂 ), reading, journaling, meditating, and just aiming to be present and mindful throughout the day. I find when I do this, whatever my day throws at me, I handle it better. Check out my Instagram for regular uplifting posts, especially when you need a pep talk or some inspirational words.

What are your plans for this holiday season? I would love to hear in the comments below!

I hope these 5 tips have helped you get a handle on how you can take care of yourself this holiday season.  No matter what you can do, it’s better then not doing anything at all. Don’t be tough on yourself if you haven’t been on your self care game. We all fall off our routines and wellness rituals when life gets tough. Just forgive yourself and do better next time!

 

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Hello! I’m Pavan

Welcome to my blog, Interior Love Affair! I'm here to help you with everything Self Love & Self Care. I'm a certified Life Coach, writer & blogger. Check out my tips on self love & home office styling. I hope you stay a while!

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There is nothing wrong with you. You’re not brok There is nothing wrong with you.
You’re not broken beyond repair.
You’re not even broken truthfully.
You’ve just been going in the wrong direction.
You’ve been going away from yourself 
Instead of toward yourself.
When you’ve gone too far away from your inner self,
You will feel lost, broken, confused, alone, helpless. 
This is not a sign of you’ve done it all wrong, that you’ve messed up, or that you’re messed up.
Take these feelings as an indicator of how far or how close you are to your own self, to your own heart. 
When you’re in the vicinity of your own heart, you will feel love, joy, peace, optimism. 
When you’re far from it, you will feel the emotions that don’t feel so good.
To get back to a better feeling place, 
It’s not about controlling the external circumstances in your life. 
It’s about pausing, being still, recognizing where you relatively in terms of your inner self and heart. 
Are you listening to your self? Or are you listening to others? Are you being led by your fears? (That’s not your true self) or are you following your heart ? (This is your true self )

Take a few deep breaths, put your hand over your heart, and ask it to show you the way. 
Listen closely and pay attention to what drops into your mind at this time, that’s your inner self showing you, guiding you to what’s for you. Even if it doesn’t make complete sense to you in that moment, trust it. Your inner self always knows the way to what’s best for you. And you’ll know you’re on the right track because it will feel good. It will feel so good to follow your heart. And it will feel awful not to. 
You’re not broken. 
You just have to come back home to your true self and allow it to lead and show you the way.
When we struggle and suffer, we may think it’s b When we struggle and suffer, we may think it’s because of our external world and circumstances, but truthfully it’s the push and pull dynamic that’s occurring inside of us. 
When we stray away from our inner self, from our intuition, it hurts. And the more self aware we are, the more we feel this. 
You’re not too sensitive, and you’re not doing anything wrong. You’re just not listening to yourself and that’s why it’s hard. You can and will feel better when you take a break from your thoughts. When you allow the current moment to take your full attention, and you allow yourself to be present and mindful. Little by little you will hear your inner voice again, because it’s always been there, it never leaves you. It’s you that leaves it. 
Little by little, you will start to feel like yourself again, and things will start to get easier and better for you. 
Your inner most self is your intuition, and when you give yourself love and quiet out the noise inside and outside of you, you will come back to it, and all of a sudden you won’t feel lost anymore, you will know the way.
If you’re wondering why you self sabotage or how If you’re wondering why you self sabotage or how to stop self sabotage so you can improve your well-being and self care, this episode is for you 😊💕.

Part of the reason we don’t take care of ourselves as well as we would like is due to our attachments to things or people that are hurting us rather than helping us. 

We think we need these external factors in order to survive, in order to feel good enough, or in order to escape the pain or void we feel. Part of self care is accepting it’s ok to have needs, and learn to meet our own needs in healthy ways. 

In this episode I talk about what unhealthy attachments are and how to start identifying them within yourself so you can replace them with healthier behaviours, and start meeting your own needs instead of depending on other people or other things.

Have a listen, available now on Apple and Spotify (see bio).
You don’t have to keep giving your peace and pow You don’t have to keep giving your peace and power away, just because you once did. 

You’re allowed to change. 
You’re allowed to grow.

You are in charge of who and what you allow in and what you give away.

You don’t have to give your power away any more.
You can keep it for yourself.
It’s OK.
It’s OK if you no longer agree to things you once agreed to.
It’s OK if you no longer allow certain behaviour or treatment even though you once did.

You’re allowed to change.
You’re allowed to grow.

It’s actually more natural to evolve than it is to stay the same.

No one should hold you to who you once were if you no longer resonate with that version of you.

People who want you to stay the same are thinking of what they need from you, and what you provide them.

You don’t owe anyone your self improvement or your inner peace.

The people in your life should want you to grow and be the happiest version of yourself. 

You don’t have to give your power away anymore. You can keep it for yourself. It’s OK. It’s time.
You ARE ready for your next level, if you weren’ You ARE ready for your next level, if you weren’t, there would be no discomfort and you would be content where you are. 
The discomfort is the clash between the new version of you that your highest self has already become, and the old version of you that your physical self is still holding on to. 

It’s like a software update has been installed but you’re refusing to use it, still clinging on to the old version. 

Allow yourself to step into your upgrade. It’s already occurred, just stop fighting it and let it in. Give yourself permission to enjoy this uplevelled version of yourself. 💕
Sometimes we need to give ourselves a reality chec Sometimes we need to give ourselves a reality check and ask who is taking care of me?

It should be you lovely. 💕
You’re suffering because you think you should be You’re suffering because you think you should be further along than you are. But that’s now how it works, and that’s only causing you more pain. 
You are where you are and there’s beauty in every season in every part of your journey. 

You will get to where you want to be. There is no other choice.

Stop beating yourself up for not already being there.

You’re growing into the version of you that matches what you want.

This takes time.

This takes learning, and more importantly unlearning of the limiting beliefs and destructive habits that have kept you from being there already. 

You WILL get to where you’re going. 
Be easy on yourself along the way. Give yourself the kindness you deserve. 
You’re doing great. 
I’m proud of you lovely 💕
We can blame others all we want, but we are just a We can blame others all we want, but we are just as much a part of any relational dynamic we are in, as the other person. 
If the relationship matters to you, there is no shame in putting your ego aside and adjusting your mindset about this person. 
Sure you have every right and every valid reason for staying mad at this person or keeping them at a distance from you. 
But you’re only harming yourself. Because the truth of the matter is you clearly have love for this person, otherwise you would not give a care about them or what they were doing or not doing. The very fact it bothers you means there’s still something there and it would serve your best  interest if you were to accept that and align with the love that you feel in your heart. It would serve your best interest to shed the ego. Shed the “I’m right and you’re wrong”. That is a fool’s game. 
The truth is, you want peace. You want love. You want joy. 
Start letting that in. 
The way you treat and perceive the people who matter to you plays a big role in your happiness. 
Even if they are not at your level, you can still be the bigger person and give your love freely. That doesn’t just let them off the hook, it lets YOU off the hook. It sets you free. Resentment and anger are hurting you just as much, if not more, then they are hurting them. Allow yourself to forgive. So you can feel the love that’s in your heart, and so you can express it once again. Not expressing love hurts. Turning away from your heart hurts. Adjust your view of this person FOR you, for YOUR benefit. So you can finally be at peace with the situation and with yourself. ✨💕
Excerpt from my latest blog post. The fear you fee Excerpt from my latest blog post. The fear you feel surrounding your goals or desires is not evidence that you can’t get there. It’s just faulty thinking, an outdated mindset, that can be recognized, released and replaced. Read the rest of my blog post to get started on recognizing the faulty thinking that holds you back. ✨✨
You are worthy of everything you desire. Whether i You are worthy of everything you desire. Whether it’s a lifestyle change, a career, a relationship, or anything in between. The very fact that you want it means it exists for you. That it’s possible. Your work is to align with that version of yourself that feels worthy of it, that feels good having it. Your work is to become that version of yourself within your energy and your vibration. To only speak words that support you in your vision. To choose the thoughts that line up with your goal, and to ignore anything else that stands in your way. 
Keep focusing on the positive feelings and results you are already experiencing. That is the route to your goals. 
Check out my latest blog post “why you haven’t reached your goals” for more. Link in bio 💕✨
After the struggle and the storm comes the beautif After the struggle and the storm comes the beautiful new you who has accepted a hard truth, faced something difficult, or let go of something harmful that you had been holding on to for sometime. 

After the breakdown of the old you, comes the breakthrough of the new you.

It’s everything you’ve been waiting for. You just had to go through that storm to get here. 

If you’re still in the storm right now.
It’s OK. When you’re ready to let go of whatever you have a tight grip on, when you’re ready to see that you are still safe, that you are still loved, that you are still going to make it, you will let go. You will let go of the coping mechanisms that once kept you safe, but now only hinder you and your growth. You will let go and allow yourself to step into the evolution of who you have become, closer to who you really are, closer to your truth. You will let go and the storm will no longer be your downfall, it will be your uprising. Instead of fearing the fire, you will become the fire. 
When you are ready to let go, you will. ✨
Instead of what someone says to me or gives I car Instead of what someone says to me or gives 
I care about what they intend for me
Do they wish me well?
Do they want what’s best for me?
Do they care about my wellbeing?
About my happiness? About my heart?
That matters more to me then anything else.
If you’re in someone’s heart, you can feel it, taste it, smell it and touch it. 

And when you’re not, it’s quite evident, even when someone’s words may say otherwise. 

There’s something only energy can communicate. 

Pay attention to the vibes you get from people. That shit’s real.

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